Perryshmirtz Valentine's Special
by horzana
Summary: Valentine's Special, Perryshmirtz. Doofenshmirtz has a crush. But of course, nothing would ever go right between them. Right?


Dr. Doofenshmirtz hated Valentine's Day, but not for the reason everyone thought he did... Okay, it actually was the reason everyone thought it would be.

The inventor pushed his brand new inator onto his balcony, grumbling as he stepped in a puddle of ice and wet slush.

Before, Doofenshmirtz had hated it because it seemed like an excuse for people to eat candy and get presents and act all lovey-dovey in public.

But this year, he hated it because he actually liked someone. Someone who would probably never return his feelings.

...any second now...

Right on cue, his duck-billed, beaver-tailed, blue-furred, fedora-wearing nemesis made his entrance, landing on the building after jumping from his beloved hovering car.

"Perry the Platypus, I thought you had Valentine's Day off! Well, I suppose you are wondering what my new inator does-wait a second... Oh! Sorry, forgot to trap you, just wait right there!"

Heinz hurried from the room looking for a trap to use, leaving Perry enough time to look over the purple invention (which looked somewhat like a giant lazer gun) for the self-destruct button that would no doubt be found on it.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz ran back huffing, an orange traffic cone under his arm. In one quick motion, he had slipped the cone over Perry's head, trapping his arms beside him.

"Sorry I took so long, the construction workers were extremely protective of their equipment."

Perry chattered back, beckoning Heinz to get on with his backstory.

"Oh, right," the doctor mumbled absentmindedly. "Long story short, I really like someone, they will never love me, and Valentine's Day is a cruel reminder. Therefore, everyone must suffer!"

Perry looked at Heinz with a confused stare. "So, yeah. No taking over Tri-state area, just ruining relationships everywhere. My Love Ruiner-inator will instantly destroy anything romantic."

The platypus couldn't help but have a slight feeling of deja vu.

At that moment, Perry escaped his confines, slipping the bright orange cone with help from a little sweat.

Heinz knew he should have expected it, but he yelped as a tail smacked against his face and he toppled back. Perry landed on the floor in a ready stance, waiting for Doofenshmirtz to respond with a swing of a fist or lazer fire.

No retaliation came.

The doctor held his cheek where he had hit, a slightly depressed look on his face as he sat with his knees to his chest staring glumly at the floor. Perry lowered his hands and walked over to his nemesis, resting his hand hesitantly on the other's leg.

Doofenshmirtz glanced at Perry before curling up on himself even more and looking away again.

Perry chattered his teeth pitifully, trying to at least gain his attention.

"I'm fine, nothing is wrong!" Heinz huffed, his spindly fingers digging into his legs. They both knew how much of a lie that was.

Perry was extremely concerned now, climbing atop the doctor's leg to sit on his knee. The platypus carefully extended his arm, patting him on the shoulder softly.

Heinz leaned, if only slightly, into the touch. Dr. Doofenshmirtz sighed, relaxing his tensed body and shifting his view back to the semi-aquatic agent.

"I'm sorry, Perry," the evil scientist murmured without breaking eye contact.

The platypus chattered sympathetically towards his nemesis, as the doctor stroked his hand across fluffed teal.

Perry felt a slight awkwardness having his fur being petted by someone other than his owners, but the hands felt soft and comfy stroking his back. Unable to stay upright, Perry slumped into the hold, his body reacting like a gelatinous pile of goo.

Dr. Doofenshmirtz smiled at the reaction, proud of the fact it was him causing it. The scientist picked up the agent, caressing Perry against his chest and down his back.

Finally seating himself on his recliner, Doofenshmirtz trailed his fingers down to the soft belly and scratched, causing Perry to almost purr.

The doctor smiled, hugging Perry to his chest and leaning close to his arch nemesis. "Perry?" Heinz whispered softly. "Will you be my valentine?"

Perry looked up to the doctor in surprise. He certainly hadn't been expecting that question. Heinz stared back, awaiting the answer. In his very core, Perry knew it was wrong, strange, against his better judgement. But Perry's better judgement had been hazed, and he no longer knew how he could possibly say no.

Perry leaned against the black shirt and breathed in deeply, rubbing his head on the cotton fabric. Without further hesitation, Perry chattered his teeth in affirmation, as Doof rubbed his silky fur once more.

Doofenshmirtz smiled as Perry fell asleep in his lap. Looked like he wouldn't need the inator after all. He had the most amazing valentine he could ask for, right there with him.

So, this is my first added fanfiction. This may or may not be one-shot, but I have several ideas on how to continue. Feel free to critique and review!


End file.
